*unsolicited life advice*

*unsolicited life advice*

"How to still be single after 40"

My ears are open Sam
I am ready to listen

It's called being a bachelor. Would you really want a wife with the way women act in the big 2024+1?

look, what you have to do is pretend to be self made while relying on your wealthy dad and crypto grifting.

*sex with trannies*
*creative bankruptcy*
*height insecurity*
*contempt for audience while simultaneously pandering*
*chronic mucus leakage*

*height insecurity*

he's 6' 5"

fanboi doesn't know. he always stands on his tiptoes when taking photos with tall fans to make sure he looks the tallest.

Life advice from a guy who made himself look like a grotesque freak

*contempt for audience while simultaneously pandering*

He might have contempt, and he might privately do the opposite of a lot of his advice irl - but I've heard quite a bit of the advice he gives younger guys, and it's decent. It's grounded in reality and measured expectations.

buzzword central over here

parasocial

in what way doe?

Thinking 16 year olds are hot is normal for someone in their 20s. Going out of your way to have sex with them is not normal especially when you are as old as he is. Idk what your age is but when you're 30+ 16 year olds look like babies. When I see a guy aggressively trying to fuck high schoolers I would assume this guy would also fuck a 12 year old given the chance. There is no excuse man. and don't hit me with the "muh Middle Ages" and "b..b..but men used to marry 9 year olds not too long ago!" as an excuse. There WAS an age of consent in the Middle Ages and we don't live on the Oregon Trail. Stop trying to excuse your sick, coom brained fetish as something natural because its not.

you talk shit, but sam is like our dad. he wants the best for us, cares about us, gives us life advice, tells us not drink or do drugs, to lift, he wants us to reach our true potential, and he gets frustrated when we go astray. those kids who dressed up in the marky shirts? he was just disappointed in them, didn't even beat their asses when he had every right to... sam is more important than you ever will be, that's not a shit talk.. it's just true

The age of consent in RI/MA is 16. It's sort of a nothing burger.

in what way doe?

Like and Dislike are two sides of the same coin of mental attachment. Chudha warns thee traveler against the subtle ties that bind. Beware!

if it's a nothingburger why did Sam's shills mass report a tweet that was getting huge traction to put a sensitive label on it to censor it?
Why care so much about something that doesnt matter?
"The Jew [Sam] is immunized against all dangers: One may call him a scoundrel, parasite, swindler, profiteer, [tranny fucker, even Jew!] it all runs off him like water off a raincoat. But call him a [not Jew]Pedo and you will be astonished at how he recoils, how injured he is, how he suddenly shrinks back: "I’ve been found out".”

the way women act in the big 2024+1?

Social media isn't real life. Most people, men and women, are just normal

I don't know man I don't really use twitter or understand how twitter reporting works. I just think it's really gay to be obsessed over a non crime.

Every normal bitch I've EVER met is a complete sociopath whore though

Because she was a virgin, it was a crime.

inb4 some idiots ask "then why isn't he in jail? trolololo

Because he mindbroke Marky so hard she never pressed charges despite her own mom trying to get her to do it.

Why are you trying to ruin someone's life?

are you really digging up blue book laws to try and get him on a technicality? You know that in Mass you couldn't buy alcohol on sundays either right? We have all these crazy laws in my state that are from the 1600s that no one pays attention to.

Im just exposing Sam's hypocrisy.

what a cuck. is this jet?

do you actually believe in this shit? double standards should always apply: what's allowed for cool artists guys (polanski, bill wyman) should not be allowed for ugly hacks (groomia, d'elia, hyde).

Sounds like to me you're trying to fuck him over

Yesterday I was sitting in the sauna and saw a guy who clearly had done roids, which isn't very rare, but then I saw some black veins on his stomach that his arm was mostly covering up. I only stared for about 3 seconds, but they were definitely there.
Seriously, bros, whatever you do, don't do roids like Sam and these other retards.

fat

ugly

balding

retard

tranny fucker

likely pedophile

Why does the right worship this guy?

because at least one of those things apply to every single Anon Babbletard

I don't think anyone "worships" him I think most people just think he's funny and take it at face value. It seems like theres a mentally ill subset of terminally online fans that have chosen to hyper fixate on Sam for some reason. In the end I think most people realize that Sam is on their side and that attacking your own team is stupid.

is hyde obsessed with idubz then?

no because Sam has pretty much moved on from talking about Idubbbz. He could have kept going harder but decided not to. The damage to Idubbbz was done.

The only side Sam is on is Sam's.

Fucking THIS. Sam is team us, and we're team Sam.

guy with rich parents tries to give life advice

as long as sam hates kikes he's OK with me

If someone watches MDE and is pushed towards even a little bit right then sam did his job

why would sam take a picture with her. he really is dumb as shit

attacking your own team is stupid

famous last words

I just like listening to his podcast clips, I don’t really agree with everything and take the advice at face value but it helps me sometimes, I wouldn’t really consider myself a fan neither

m-muh right vs left is the key to life

wtf, you literally sound like a fascist trumper

Attach pubic hair to head

Is it cringe to wear arch support insoles? I’ve always hated how my shoes make me taller but my feet are dead without em

Because he's a self-hating Jew

muh didactic '''art'''

nanny state snowflake detected

Sam's content is literally turning his fans into faggots man, dunno what to say you sound way to invested in identity politics to the point you'd bend over to any Jew that entertains your ideas in exchange for shekels.

I hope sam goes to jail so i never have to see another shill thread again

sam has a lot of bitterness in him that is very visible when he is forcefully giving people "advice". everyone knows you shouldnt drink or do drugs, especially people who do them. but not everyone has a trust fund like sam, some people are just fucked up. his advice falls flat because so much of it seems to depend on somehow changing who you are fundamentally as a person which he admits himself isnt possible.

no one knows who these no name mentally ill twitter people are

I don't think I've ever met anyone who's a fan of his.

They're MDE fans.

Be a fucking man you soft faggot

idk man I think you need to get of twitter it's poisoning your brain

Well uhh when I tried I sorta lost my arch, blue collar jobs suck ass, just get a comfy desk job somewhere

Idk im unemployed

in all the time ive been on Anon Babble and in these threads ive realized one thing: people who hate sam are evil

Sam dindu nuffin he's a good kid

I haven't watched enough of anything he's made to have an informed opinion on him, but you shouldn't take advice from anyone who does roids.

sam is purposefully trying to convince the youngins to give up art. this is emphasized way more than the fact that doing creative shit on the side is easier when you're an electrician than an office worker or any evils of the industry, he just wants to get rid of the competition and makes his fans pay to hear it.

The funny part is she was actually 15, so it is serious, if it was nothing, then he would've made fun of the situation already. He's a nutcase, part of why he got kicked from adult swim was for putting keyloggers on everyone's computer and secretly recording convos, they didn't even press charges

It's like how the right protects jews now ironically or sincerely, everyone is raped mentally, they don't even know it. You're being forced to "pick a side", when you genuinely don't have to.

In that case why not go to the police with your evidence. It seems like you have a lot. I don't understand why people post this stuff online ad nauseam like cowards. You spent the time doing the research why not try to achieve something with it.

Yeah he's like a dad, disappointed with his own life, full of bad advise, and trying to relive his existence through others while he flounders around as a D list celebrity only brought to attention when someone else does it for him

Didn't Sam admit to it actually, not like it matters because Sam is loaded on BTC, who cares? Someone simply knowing Sam is a shitty person is enough for most, no one cares that much

I don't understand

you don't, the cow still gives milk, the allegations can wait until he becomes andy dick himself

no one cares that much

you sure dude? they seem to care a lot lol. Do you make threads and post the same images over and over and screenshot posts and things on twitter when you don't really care about something? They can say they don't care and try to play it off but clearly they've invested time into this.

Scam Hyde
grifting retards in 2025 with bot shill threads

so you need to make yourself indis- bigblackbilbo with the $10 thanks man - make yourself indispensable. make yourself unforgettable. when people see you - thanks vegetamaster420 for the $20 - when they see you, you want them to think you're the missing piece. when you walk in the room everyone they should be immedi- dreideldemon69 thanks for the $15 - they should all immediately be on the defensive. one look and they're off in this mind maze of endless turns and traps. and that's why you're going to win, because in reality the only person you're competing with is yourself. can you avoid - tabletripper thanks for the $20 - can you avoid your worst impulses? that little voice that says "nothing matters! let's shoot $200 of chemicals in my arm!" that's what you need to be thinking about. now where did i put that diamond pick axe...

Will he repeat his points 30 times like he does for all of his "jokes"?

And you are the common factor in all those relationships

Do the normal people in this thread think that these retards overlap with the schizos that obsess over James Rolfe?

I think all these people have a lot in common with vtuber schizos. It has something to do with the accessibility of minor online personalities that attracts mentally ill people. If it wasn't this they'd be writing letters to their local weatherman

The wealth transfer from Sam's fat soijack paypigs is something to behold. Notice how if it wasn't for his fat blubber, the guy wearing the expensive and thin Sam Hyde t-shirt would probably freeze to death, while Sam would laugh at him in the comfy 1500 dollar parka that that fat faggot paid for.

the normal people itt hate sam, you're living in a fucking fool's paradise, dawg.
you don't like griftosphere talking points comedy? you must be a progressive cuck who wants his wife banged by illegal arab immigrants. you should give sam all your money to support the ''''cause''''.

fuck your advertisement and filter avoiding spam.

Yes. Such small heights shouldn't be reason for ridicule and jokes. Love everyone no matter what their size and colour S2

hasn't dated in his thirties

Thanks for your opinion Zoomer

date a younger bitch. too ugly?

I dated 21 year old at 33. She was insane.

dat jewface tho

what did being a zoomer had to do with anything then? sounds like you don't have a point.

Dating in your 30's sucks and most of the single women have serious issues.

fails to address the zoomer part. this is your brain on memes.

Because she was a virgin

How do you know?

Zoomers don't understand because they are not in their 30's. Lay off the tide pods, damn.

I'm her doctor.

This the type of nigga who probably believes he'd destroy every leftist in a debate. Why say shit when you don't even know what you mean?

Zoomers can't troll either. You're an embarrassment.

Yeah he tells you that if you donate first.
Retard

T. Anon who’s posted in previous threads that’s done work with them / had work stolen by them

asking a simple question i'm unable to answer due to permanent brainrot is trolling

how sensitive can a snowflake get?

1. what happened?
2. why did you work with them in the first place? was this in 2014 when hyde was still trying?

Stop it. You're making your generation look bad.

that's just one barely verbal mongoloid's opinion

Bad life advice.
Dude's a trainwreck
Sure he's wealthy, but he's a fucking mess. I'd be surprised if he lives to 50.

judging from the ftl viewer count during s3 he won't be wealthy too long

Ah man. Can't wait until Jet goes broke and his schizophrenic daddy stops being the recipient of his rent checks and has to suck dick for meth on the street, or try to grift another Dunkin out of $1000 bucks.

I “knew” them that far back, but they didn’t pay any attention to me until I’d started openly working with musicians they either liked, or as far as Bic and Joey go outright admire. Then I had value, so I was worth speaking to on a more regular basis.
(If you’re in either industry don’t do anyone but rappers favors, artists are little faggots - the same “feminized office place backstab nonsense” Sam talks about hating are the exact practices his entire crew uses to get themselves ahead. Most artists are like this because they don’t know the value of loyalty.

Anyway, bunch of their shit from 2020-now was inspired by the work I do with musicians, I have a few scripting “credits” here and there insofar as things I’ve posted on their socials ended up in skits or on their streams (without credit), they follow me en-mass and it’s just a coincidence that when I bring all this up (anonymously, on Anon Babble) I’ve had Jet suddenly unfollow me. That I’ve had random “e-girls” message me telling me I “don’t make real art”. Etc etc. I’ve expressed “inner circle” bullshit
(Like things with chuck) only for social posts the following days that “disprove” what I’ve exposed. Sam blocked me for calling him out about it, twice.
But he’s the king of confrontation, right?
He’s the same coward he always was, he’ll only open his mouth when he’s certain he’ll win, or things are “safe” like boxing matches.

This isn’t as organized as I’d like but I don’t care as much.
Fuck ‘em. You people don’t know how faggy these idiots actually are, and you’re better for it, take the good at face-value and use it to benefit yourself.
Don’t donate money, either. Fucks sake that one tier of his whatever used to be called paypig. That makes -you- the joke, not part of it.

why would you hate jet with so much vigor? he's dumb. hyde, however, knows what he's doing.

I don't hate Jet.
His father is the insufferable one.

Insider bro, again.
As much as I can’t stand his constant creative theft (it isn’t solely from me, obviously. I’ve had like ten good ideas my entire life, which is why it’s all the more aggravating to have the hotline idea I made for the band stolen. It’s anyone mildly interesting that he feels he can get away with stealing from - for example all of their junkie skits/jokes/videos were farmed from recovery-meme pages)
Jets the current, and primary creative force in MDE.

Sam just sits around and talks.

Don't care.

farmed from recovery-meme pages

this is classic hyde-o-nomics though, the entire 2070 speech was compiled from fan ideas. he even asks for ideas on twitter during ftl, A PAYWALLED SHOW.

Shocking

Yeah, but if you’re a “good enough fan” you can get a -job- with them.

social media isn't real life

That's sort of the issue. All the idiots acting like it is. You think that's just incels? You cannot imagine the amount of eyerolling I've performed at idiot normies quoting for truth shit like Facebook pol shit, female dating strategy, or idpol trolls. And i don't just mean retarded slang either (which is harmless if irritating)
There's even political lobby groups trying to push narratives that we knew were memes years back.
Granted, real life interactions have the possibility of actually showing real life isn't as retarded as social media. But the overlap is absolutely disturbing af.
I expect it from kids and shit. But grown ass adults who should know better?
People are fucking idiots. Offline as well as on.

You cannot imagine the amount of eyerolling I've performed

sassy

hotline idea

is this referring to some wigger sketch? with all due respek, you're writing comes across as a bit fented.

Ok virgin, tell your mother I said hey

It’s referring to a specific promo along with other promos and creative direction I lead for a band from 2019-2024. Started with .VSTs, made a name for myself by taking them from 18k to 200k with a combination of that, and some production / connections in their 2021 album.
Of which MDE themselves, and most egregiously their shitty shirt company has ripped off an enormous amount of (I was in talks with them to do some designs because D loved my work, then some weird little dickhead took what was “talking shop”, used the ideas given, and used the entire method of sales I’d explained I used with the band merch)

It’s fairly pervasive, but I provided enough detail as is necessary.

lmfaoooooo
oh man.

can u show examples?

Leak the DMs? Nah.
Only way that happens is if the cancer kills me at all, or sooner than expected.

I’m not on some weirdo hate campaign like that tranny that worked with them, I'm just expressing the reality of working with “creatives”
I’ve proven all of this before, much to my chagrin. It takes like two seconds of looking into things to see how flagrant it is.

But I will say, with the band I specifically used only three fonts, Arial, Helvetica, and Epsilon True (it’s not a scaled times-new-Roman, it’s a proprietary font, and chosen specifically because of an IPs love within the community). Back in the day I had plenty of conversations with Bic, and D, and WHOIS about my love of those fonts due to their versatility, and with arial in particular, a noted increase in sale because of a combination of “font theory” bullshit and cohesion with “most often used being an ironic way to stand out”. It’s ~artist~ nonsense I don’t feel like typing again.

The Hotline is the only thing I care about because I got fucked on that in more than one way, and that was probably the best idea I’ve ever had. The only reason I used it with the band is because short of an existing fandom (which I’ve tried, and subsequently failed to fucking avoid cultivating for myself) couldn’t serve its function.

lol bro I’ve figured it out now, you were the interim keyboardist / producer / “creatives director” for that faggot band who’s in all of those mid video games like ultrakill. Your opening for them in Philly two years ago was embarrassing to see. “Oh wow look at me I’m doing the thing from the tour promo I’m so interesting”. Your band has a fandom full of furries. Who ya working with now? Any Marketing for scat fetishists? I’ve seen your dumbass comments you’re as fucking cracked as Charls, so no fucking wonder the two of you get along.

hi, ftl staffer. have you been fucked by andy dick yet?

In this thread, gay freaks seethe about Sam Hyde while thinking they're doing anything productive.
Sage and filter.

sweep harder, paypig

You know an awful lot about me for “figuring it out”.

Pretty weird, man.
So you’re either one of Jets simps. Or it’s you, and I hope that’s the case. Because man oh man, I have wanted to say this for a while. At least Sam blocked me after I called him out : FYI because a close friend of yours couldn’t repay me for getting him in touch with Mr. Grammys (you know, one of your own, Bic, and Joeys biggest idols, who now refuses work with any of you because of your flagrant disregard to loyalty; just in case any of y'all ever wondered why he stopped replying)
Your own “bro” let me know why you “hate me” on a call, and for real dude? “Because I’m good looking I didn’t have to cultivate my personality. I never had to go through strife to become “funny””. Guy, idgaf about being funny, it isn’t on purpose it’s because I’m a retard.

And I dunno man, if that’s how you feel it’s pretty ironic you don’t see that as self-flagellation. You’re ugly as fuck and your best work is an amalgam of things created by lesser minds, greater than yours. But, with a special OCDONUTSTEAL sticker on it.
And yeah, fuck me am I gay for opening to a crowd of thousands of people who think I’m interesting and talented just for sitting there. I don’t control the fandom, that’s not even -my- band, retard. I fell into it because of the cancer taking me out of the workforce, and after losing my house I couldn’t sit around doing nothing.

Give more of my ideas to Brandon though, at least he’s a solid dude. Julian floundering with it is sad to see, at least his wasn’t down to the fucking name like I don’t have the email-chain. So you’re getting better at stealing, at the very least.

Although, knowing how conniving all of you are, he probably doesn’t even know and assumes it was another one of your brilliant ideas.

Lmao, just look away from the screen, nigga, like nigga just close your eyes lolol

Implying

Ok freak

Fucking exactly.

I’ve explained this in previous threads and it’s probably common knowledge but they do pay people a decent amount to monitor and astroturf any online nay-sayers, or “leakers”.
Again, thus why you’ll see their socials “disproving” things days after someone or other will spill in threads like these.

Like the one about chucks marriage falling apart, and two days later effina posts she and chuck for the first time in almost a year.
Probably just a coincidence.

Admittedly chuck is a solid dude, he’s using Sam, their friendship is still rocky as fuck. Chuck won’t ever trust him again, and it’s why he’s off in his own corner with Nick, who’s his real best friend.

Nick only went back for the e-bucks when his big fat wife got pregnant and he wanted that easystreet online money.
Ignore that his brother casually sells seven figure homes, he’s struggling.

When one of his “best friends” lived 2014-2016 in a fucking shed.

Are you the dude who’s always in their IG comments talking shit? idk who can see what you post as a friendly joke. That one you left on nicks thing was fucking hilarious dude. All of the misspellings and name changes killed me the fact they still follow you despite all of your literal shit talking speaks for itself. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they steal that shit too

get a skill, get two

Nice glaze, thanks man, I wouldn’t be surprised either.

But uhhh, someone “figured it out”
So you already know, why ask?

Take care of yourself / selves regardless, I’m out brothers

Are you still dating that tall pasty bitch? Is she gonna be in FT? Cause she kinda cute ngl

only associate with whores

"why are all women whores"

Are we the groomers?

sam only gets fucked by trannies though. he is also slowly easing into being gay publicly, he'll drop something like cousins within 5 years. watch that unhinged and mad straight rant about disliking tits to see what i mean.