Story time

ok Anon Babble story time tell me your best funny, wholesome, horny, degenerate, sexy, or funny (again) stories

or make stuff up

Nigga Heil Hitler

Fuck you! You fucking fuck-ass fuck!

Short Story:

The last man on earth sat in a room.
There was a knock at the door.

Sounds fucked! Like a total fucking shit fuck!

if the dishwasher ever clogged at what pressure does the first seam burst and will it be down or up

Fucked if I know? Do some research you lazy fuck!

if i heat myself with microwave can i do augmentation treatments increase blood flow to individual knuckles with a constant heat.

No, don't be a retard you piece of shit nigger fuck.

The man froze in his chair, clenching the armrests, terrified by a sound that was once mundane to him.

Knock knock knock

A little louder this time, and so became the thumping in his chest. His eyes began to water up, and he knew this was the end, they've finally come for him. All he could do was close his eyes and wait.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK...

But the knocking just continued. It continued for what felt like ages to the petrified man.

Finally, the knocking stopped, and there was only silence.

Stacy gives up knocking and bursts into tears. She's the last woman on Earth and she still gets rejected.

FUCK FUCK FUCK

FUCK FUCK FUCK

FUCK FUCK FUCK

I don't give a fuck!

Stacy wants you to impregnate her and you don't give a fuck?

I saw Paul Rudd at a grocery store yesterday.

I saw Paul Rudd at a grocery store yesterday.

I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

After paying for the Milky Ways he proceeded to leave the store and throw all of them in the garbage. Haven't seen him since.

Fuck Stacy and her fucked up cunt, fuck it!

I have never liked that faggot fuck-ass shit cunt.

Not really a story...

But Every single time i had sex between the age of 12 and 14 was on camera.
The Vast vast VAST majority of the times between 14 and 17 were also on camera.
Not a single time since then has been on camera
more then a goof 75% of the times i had sex was on camera

Fuck you! You larping fuck-ass pussy.

Paul Rudd must be a fan of Bill murray.

Bill Murray is an unfunny shit cunt, fuck him!

Was it your dad or someone else? Also, did said camera operator put said videos online? (No I do not want to see them as that would be illegal and just wrong of course.)

Fuck you nigger.

Real story

Be me, early 20's

Pre drink at home with very hot girls

Cabs arrive for the bar so I take a quick bathroom break

Fart as I pee and instantly purr liquid shit comes out.

No other bar clothes

Quickly change pants and get into cab

Can smell shit everywhere

Can ride is only a 4 minute drive because it's woman deciding

No one ever said anything.

To this day I wonder if maybe the smell was all in my head.

Dirty ass fuck!

You have to be over 18 to post here.

Cringe! Fuck you, die in a fire you unoriginal faggot!

A man tried to do everything he could to get a job, he had all the skills needed for it, but luck always beat him, fed up he saw a company who rejected him and built their product and decided to recreate it better and sold it while making almost no profit. He kept doing this, was earning nothing but due to huge price gap ended up making the company loose millions. Eventually company offered to buy him out and end up making much more than he could have while working for them. He then started a group and they just started pickig one company at a time and keep undercutting them and getting bought out making fortune with each deal

Oh I see. It's a bot.

No not my dad.
But both of them (12-14 and 14-17) were much older then me.

As far as I know, none of them have made it online.
I have never been contacted by police or "fans" so if they are online, i have not been identified

That would be a no, you dumb fucking faggot nigger, you don't know fuck all!

Well there's that at least. I hope you're doing relatively okay these days.

Wrong again you nigger fucking dumbass fuck!